We were with friends for the weekend. I am 52 and as a female of that age, I spent the last month working out harder and avoided alcohol, caffeine and sugar. I do not smoke or do drugs. We started the evening fine and one friend started pouring shots. I did 4. A sugar filled shot. I still felt fine.
This friend uses marijuana on a daily basis. I don't like it, never have and certainly don't condone it but this was a private home and he is an adult. Some of the friends took their share of his pipe. He knows my feelings on it. As the night went on, but still fairly early he came over and said, come on everyone else took one. I thought, OK, one and done. I took a drag off the pipe and immediately felt odd. My heart raced and I felt like my body was paralyzed. I asked to be taken to bed. I lost all track of time from then on. But I laid on the bed and asked my husband not to leave me.
I remember breathing rapidly; then all a sudden the blood draining from my face, and trying to move my hands and not being able to. The only word I could use to describe how I felt was gray. Like my body went gray, like a cigarette burns the paper, the gray went from my head to my entire body.
My husband told me that I stopped breathing, and he watched my chest stop moving. and that my face went gray and he said I immediately looked 100 years old. My face went gray and hollow.
It seemed like seconds, but at that time I was traveling in a tunnel--very dark and, to me, claustrophobic. The light was bright and got brighter and brighter. I saw no faces. and can't say I "heard" voices but clearly was told "we love you more here." And I remember thinking, if I died that night or that way, the guilt would kill my friends. And I said, "I can't die this way. I am 52. Not now. Please." And I begged to please be sent back. And I said, "I can make him love me that way." I am not sure if I felt love like Christ-like. A part of me worried it was Satan, to be honest. I worried that the devil was trying to take me and promise me a better love to trick me. I am a Christian, but not a perfect one. I don't doubt I will go to heaven, but I am a worrier and that has crossed my mind.
I asked my husband if he heard me saying, "please send me back," over and over, in a raspy crying voice. He did not. But he felt my body and saw me die, as he said, and then he shook me to wake me up. I woke up as if I was surfacing a body of water. I could not breathe, but was not gasping for air. I was numb. I finally surfaced the black tunnel, and he said I gasped for air as I woke and kept saying to him, "Its ok, I can love you." He asked what I meant and I said, "He said it's OK." And when he asked who, he said my eyes went back and up to the ceiling. He kept asking who, and I just said, "He did; it's OK."
Had my husband not been there, I might not be here or ever have told a soul. But on our way home yesterday, after no mention of it at all, I said, "So let's talk about Friday night." He said, "Holy crap, Hon...I am not sure what you mean, but I swear I think you died. I saw you die. I am 100% sure you were dead for a few seconds." And we discussed what he saw and what I felt. It's very scary and surreal. And I worry or wonder more what the message is. What am I to learn from this? Why me? Why was I allowed to come back? And I do worry, why didn't they take me? Even though I begged to come back. Like, am I worthy to be there? As it's still so new and raw and real, its just hard to figure out. I am glad my husband was there. I just wish we both knew what to do with this experience.
IANDS Group Representatives – INVITATION to Online* Special Events on Wednesday, August 29.
o Free training – 10:00 to 11:30 am PDT (1:00 to 2:30 pm EDT)
o You can be an online group facilitator (learn how, see what it takes)
o Sound Bites from ISGO™ Pilot group – spontaneous testimony video from 8 pilot participants. Do watch/listen now! These clips may be rough as recordings, but they are genuine and when you listen to the messages, they can be transformative.
o Get your personal bio listed on the ISGO™ website as an online groups facilitator.
o Check out this pdf version of the ISGO™ brochure being handed out to the IANDS conference audience! (For the full effect, print a 2-sided copy and fold for a 3-panel color brochure.)
NOTE: Send email to This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. to receive the Zoom meeting link and unique password to participate in this ISGO™ training session.
o Join the seminar at 1:00 pm PDT (4:00 pm EDT).
o Round-robin introductions of participants online and in-person.
o Bo Billups presentation “Tips for Elevator Talks” 2 pm PDT (5 pm EDT) - how to share your message when given a brief window to talk about what you do. Bo is a long-time, award-winning member of Toastmasters, in a senior-level leaders position.
o Open discussion time – includes doing 1-on-1 recordings of a spontaneous elevator talk.
o Greg Wilson presentation “The Art and Importance of Pre-interviewing NDErs” 4:00 pm PDT (7:00 pm EDT). This is a talk that everyone, who ever facilitates an IANDS group meeting, should see. Greg has been doing this as a vetting process for screening guest speakers for Seattle IANDS for over decades now. These hints and tips to sort out the “integration” phase that experiencers are in and their readiness to share their story can make all the difference between a stand-out meeting and a rush to the exit by a bruised audience.
o More open discussion time for topics with participant nominated priorities.
NOTE: Send email to This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. to receive the Zoom meeting link and unique password to participate in the IANDS Leaders Seminar – online! Also, include topic nominations for subjects you would like to see covered in the open discussion times.
Join us online in Bellevue … be part of the IANDS Groups leadership team and help assure the future of quality online group experiences! All the best, +/Chuck
* To join online sessions, you should have a good quality internet connection. Be in a relatively quiet location with minimal background clutter. Please join using a device having a microphone and webcam (cell phones are not recommended and phone calls w/o video will be in listen-only mode). More device information and join instructions will be sent with the Zoom link and password.
Dept. of Defense Study of Combat Veterans, NDE researcher Dr. David Hufford speaks Wed. 4/11 at 9 pm EDT. OPEN TO ALL Press Control key + click on the following link here: Premier ISGO™ Webinar . Professor Emeritus of Neural & Behavioral Science, Psychiatry & Medical Humanities from the Milton S. Hershey Medical Center of Penn State Univ., David Hufford, PhD will include highlights in his presentation from his Dept. of Defense funded study of Combat Veterans. Cutting edge researcher of Near-Death & similar experiences, Dr. David Hufford, PhD, will be featured speaker for the inaugural edition of IANDS new ISGO™ Webinar service. Registration costs are free ($0) for new IANDS members (Join Here), $5 for IANDS members & $10 public.
Your donation information has now been sent to our office and your credit card has been charged. If the email you supplied was correct, you will be receiving an email confirmation shortly. All donations to IANDS are fully US tax deductible.
In a few days, you will receive a receipt of your contribution by mail. If you have questions, please contact the IANDS office.
When I was 5, I was playing in my room when my mom walked in and told me and 2 of my older siblings that we could go swimming.
Copies of earlier versions of pages
Page 3 of 6